The Effects of Porn
WARPED CONCEPTS OF REALITY
Over the years, pornography has experienced many transformations due to the internet's availability and development. It has become more addictive than ever before. Virtual Reality as an ideal example, transforms pornographic experiences for the viewer from detached perspectives to positions within the stories as protagonists. This makes it very hard for individuals to detach from these fantasies that seem so close to reality. Games and advertisements with intense graphic depictions of lewd and violent sexual behaviour have become highly prevalent and interactive across porn websites, further enticing the viewers to immerse themselves in these pornographic online wormholes.
All of this blurs the lines between fantasy and reality, which means there’s an incredibly high risk of damage to existing and potential relationships of the real world and the encouragement of violent, sexual behaviour. In addition, the majority of porn depicts the wounded, disconnected and toxic masculine and feminine, which perpetuates toxic relating to each other and the opposite sex. It also objectifies women, stripping them of their rights as sovereign human beings, represents a brutal male-dominated society hungry for power and even condones sex slavery, and if not outright overtly, it’s subtly and subliminally.
Whilst erotic imagery has been around for millennia and has been used in a variety of ways to bring about altered experiences of lavish nature, the way we see this imagery depicted now is a massively distorted version of intimacy and erotica. The majority of porn isn’t healthy. Admittedly, there are some types of porn which represent eroticism and sexual exploration beautifully and carefully, with deep connection between its actors. However, most of it is rushed, chaotic, stressful and destructive to the human body, not to mention the soul. Cheap, harmful, low budget, self-made videos by individuals across the world, proffered for likely pathetically small fees do nothing for accelerating our levels of consciousness and consideration for ourselves, each other and the world we live in. There is a lot of porn out there that consists of damaging sexual expressions. There is no real depth of connection, sacred intimacy or love involved within most of what is depicted. Porn provides instant gratification only on a highly superficial level usually for men as an audience. Watching it releases dopamine, as well as ejaculate obviously, which seems like a nice fix and relief but ultimately becomes a trap of addiction that limits authentic and powerful self expression and connection to our deep and wholesome sensuality. It empties the heart and body of true power, love and nourishment.
SEXUAL VIOLENCE
Porn, in recent years, has been characterised by increased violence. The nature of porn has become more damaging to the woman. A survey of over 300 porn stars reveals that 88% of sex scenes contain physical aggression. Most perpetrators are males, with the females at the receiving end of the violence. The women's commonest response to this show of violence and aggression is a display of pleasure and submission. Why is this considered a completely natural response to exploitation?
The creators of porn have a lot to answer for if they’re encouraging acts of sexual violence in society through their content. Whether knowingly or unknowingly, creators of porn represent a world in which it is okay to express yourself however you might like sexually, whatever fetish suits. What is the extent of harm this can generate in society at large? How many vulnerable, impressionable and easily manipulated psyches can chance across this content or even search for it and take the displays quite literally as acceptable, even normal behaviour to conduct in real life?
Every time there is a heinous crime involving sexual violence, rape and other atrocities, we’d be wise to look at the perpetrator’s personal and intimate habits. This is to understand their motives and educate ourselves for protection against and avoidance of such harm inflicted upon ourselves by individuals like this. If porn is a regular part of these individuals’ lives, there’d be strong implication that it has encouraged, normalised and even triggered these acts. The perception of sexual violence becomes normal through a lot of porn content, therefore, it has magnetic influence and potential for reinforcing dangerous actions and extreme misogyny.
THE OBJECTIFICATION OF WOMEN
Sexual visuals of women are superficial and strip a woman of her individuality, potential, varied qualities and skills across creativity and intelligence. This generates an incomplete image of woman and an objectification of her. This is something that men and women very much struggle with when influenced by these perceptions of how women are or how they’re supposed to look and be. Men, in that they expect a woman to behave dumb and submissive like the models or actors do in pornographic visuals, receive a vicious shock and sense of disempowerment when they realise many real life women aren’t like that. Women, in that they place expectations upon themselves to be that way for men and limit their creative and intellectual potential.
Porn creates a delusional and distorted image of the feminine and masculine. It has very little to do with true feminine or masculine power, beauty and radiance. There is a common expectation amongst men, that when a woman advances on a man, she wants sex. When she visits his apartment on their first date, that she’ll submit to him for sex. That if she accepts a nicety or gift from him, she’ll provide sexual acts as payment. And sadly, this is often the case. Many women often feel obliged to fulfil these expectations, not knowing how to respect themselves, say firm “No’s” or lay healthy boundaries. They may also feel inclined to present as needy and in search of a possessive rescuer to fulfil their desires for intimacy which is are unhealthy and disempowered feminine qualities. Women need not be helpless little girls that need attention and mollycoddling.
Those who watch porn begin to expect the feminine to behave in a certain way for the masculine. People who grow up with role models influenced by porn culture and sex fiendish behaviour do not get in touch with their innate divine feminine aspect and henceforth, can become very disconnected from their gentle, powerful and intuitive qualities.
Many women sense something doesn’t sit right in their intimate associations with men who have porn addictions and objectify women. It's revealed obviously in the bedroom. They act like disconnected, immature boys grasping for treats in the form of soft, fleshy body parts instead of passionate, mature lovers reaching fearlessly into the nurture and love of these womens’ souls. The awakened feminine is the goddess of wisdom, power, love and sexuality. This is the image of women that needs to be cultivated across the world for all to see.
WHEN YOU STOP WATCHING PORN
Are you doing yourself any favours by continuing to watch porn? Do you notice how disconnected from yourself and your lover/s it makes you become?
When you stop watching it you have the opportunity to then become a conscious, connected lover and to become someone who can express their sexuality in wholesome and fulfilling ways with healthy explorations with partners based upon mutual consent, respect and nurture for each other.
When we clear unhealthy obsessions with sex, we have space to observe what else exists of intimacy and authentic connection between us and others. Vulnerability, softness, tenderness, grace, intricacy and delicateness amongst so many other beautiful things are allowed to be expressed, shine and influence the experiences we create with others. Intimacy can be about slowing down and connecting with our hearts’ deepest yearnings in the sacred dance of lovemaking.
With authentic and deeply connected intimacy the feminine is no longer considered a sexual object of desire but a living, feeling, breathing, radiant goddess worthy of love, adoration and affection. What really turns us on and catalyses our most erotic experiences is authentic connection to energy in flow between us across body, sex, heart, mind and soul. When you see another you find beautiful and attractive, what is it that makes them this to you? It’s their energy, radiance and mystique of their soul, not just their physicality.
The way we relate to each other can become more considered and compassionate without overstimulating imagery that reveals only partial truths and a saturation of fantasies. Developing more awareness of the dynamic dance of masculine and feminine energy can enlighten us to the fact that porn is an expression of deeply rooted sexual trauma and a battle of the masculine over feminine for power, a dark shadow that has been eroticised.
